Old Friends in My Front Hall

     My oldest and dearest friends live in my front hall. I am lucky enough to have an entrance that is a ten foot built-in bookcase, complete with library ladder.  On those shelves are my oldest friends, the books I read as a child and still love as an adult.

     If you've been reading the blog awhile, you know that I am a compulsive reader. As a school librarian I read everything that came in before I put on the school shelves.  I still read as many new books as I can possibly cram on my Kindle ( alas, book shelves have their limits, even when you weed them twice a year), but very few books I have read as an adult have had the same impact on me that the books I read in elementary school.

    I have read a lot of good books as an adult--The Percy Jackson series, the Hunger Games Trilogy, Libba Bray's The Diviners, My Family for the War by Anne C. Voohoeve.  As much as I enjoyed these books and would recommend them to anyone (hint, hint), I still crave my old friends.

   Who are these old friends? It depends on my mood.  When I need cheering up, Patrick Dennis's books, Auntie Mame, Auntie Mame Around the World and The Joyous Season never fail to make me laugh out loud. Note:  even though these three have child narrators and I read them in the sixth grade, they aren't considered children's literature.

     The Little House on the Prairie series by Laura Ingalls Wilder is a good cure for the boy-I-think-I-have -problems feeling.  I just re-read The Long Winter, my favorite of them all, last week.  Chapter after chapter of blizzards, grinding wheat and twisting hay to burn as fuel, and your life, whatever it is, looks pretty good in comparison. (Yes, I know there are certain aspects of these books that are considered not so PC these days, but political correctness is a topic for a different post.)

    Days when life seems to be at best, confusing, I pull out my well worn Charlotte's Web, the only book I know that can make you laugh and cry in the same chapter. Templeton the rat remains one of my all time favorite characters, and I suspect, the originator of snark. 

   The Diary of a Young Girl reminds me that life goes on, no matter your circumstances. This was a book that I read so much in middle school that my original copy if held together with rubber bands. This was a book I all but crawled inside.  Sometimes I felt as if I were living with the Frank family instead of my own, they became so real to me.

     These are my old friends, the ones I return to time and again when I am sad or lonely or just having a crummy day.  Tell me who your old friends are, the books you read and re0read.

Posted by Mary Ann Rocman

Teen Read Week! Poetry Friday!

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Howdy Campers and happy Poetry Friday!

Thanks to Cathy of MerelyDayByDay for hosting today!

(My own poem's below.) 

And did you know that October 13-19, 2013 is Teen Read Week?

Neither did I, until Carmela, who is always on top of things, pointed it out.

Teen Read Week is an initiative of Young Adult Library Services Association (YALSA), which is part of the American Library Association.

Launched in 1998, Teen Read Week is celebrated annually during the third full week in October. Aimed at teens, their parents, librarians, educators, booksellers and other concerned adults, the continuing message of the Teen Read Week initiative is to encourage 12- to 18-year-olds to "Read for the Fun of It." The 2013 sub-theme is Seek the Unknown @ your library.  Check out the FAQs here.

Help raise awareness about Teen Read Week and library services for teens here.

Can I be totally honest here?  Yes, I think I can.  I'm out of steam this week, I have only air-popped popcorn for brains right now...

so the only thing I can think to say about Teen Read Week is that teens today are LUCKY, LUCKY, LUCKY that they have so much wonderful literature to read...and that it's FREE at their local library.  (Never fear--my fellow bloggers will have lots to say about it in the next few days--stay tuned!)

Hooray for librarians in buses, bookmobiles and buildings small and tall, in towns and fields, malls and halls, for offering teens, 'tweens, kings and queens fine literature to have, to hold, to devour!  

 This is a medal for all librarians.

I was thinking about the theme Seek the Unknown @ your library.  Here's a poem from my teen novel in poems, Girl Coming in for a Landing, illustrated (in collage!) by Elaine Clayton (Knopf) that sorta-kinda fits the theme:

IMPRINTING
by April Halprin Wayland

Today Mr. C told us
about this scientist who pushed a vacuum cleaner
past a brood of ducklings
just as they were hatching
and how after that,
those ducklings followed the vacuum cleaner 
everywhere--
nearly glued to it.

Imprinting, he called it.

Which made me think
about last year
that first day of school
and how
I must have been
hatching
just as Carlo
walked past.
(c) April Halprin Wayland. All rights reserved.

Here's the URL of the SHORT video of baby ducks following the guy, which hopefully, you can see below.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dk5ogma8aZg 

But it keeps crashing, so just go to YouTube and look up all the videos using the key words,
"baby ducks following" and watch those baby ducks go!


Posted by April Halprin Wayland who is grateful for the free photos of the popcorn and the medal from MorgueFile.com

Wednesday Writing Workout

Today's writing workout combines my Monday post with an exercise from Elaine Marie Alphin's Creating Characters Kids Will Love. That exercise is:

"Read the community news pages in your newspaper. Find an article about a kid who's done something special. Based on the information in the newspaper, plan how you would interview that particular youngster for an article for kids."

I hope you'll give this one a try. Magazines, especially, welcome articles highlighting kids who are making a positive difference in the world or their small corner of it.

Back in ye olden days (late 90s) when I was a green writer trying to build credits, I read an article in my local paper about a young man from a nearby city who had grown up in a home where the Mississippi River was literally in his backyard. He'd noticed lots of trash left behind by spring flooding, and, upon learning that nobody else was cleaning it up, he'd started spending his summer breaks doing so himself. When I interviewed him at age 23, he had just founded Living Lands & Waters, an organization dedicated to cleaning up not just the 2,300 miles of Mississippi River shoreline (4,600 miles, counting both banks!), but all American waterways.

I entered the article in a contest and did well, so I sent it on to Highlights for Children. They accepted the piece, publishing it in 2002. Since then, they've resold it 8 times, and that young man, Chad Pregracke (Google him. He's all over the internet.) has gone on to win dozens of awards, give countless interviews (mine was the first article written for kids), and spoken all over the world urging others to environmental activism. In fact, he has just been named one of the ten finalists for CNN's Heroes 2013 - Everyday People Changing the World award. You can read about that here (and vote for him!).

Back to writing....You never know when something you spot in your local paper could spark an idea that could pay off for you in ways both large and small (satisfaction and monetary compensation, in that order, ha). So keep your eyes peeled, and in the meantime, practice your interviewing and writing skills with Elaine's exercise.

Success = preparation + perseverance

Jill Esbaum

Bullying? Yeah, but...

Since I'm the last of us to blog about bullying, I wanted to end on a positive note. Although bullying is as awful here as anywhere else, something great happened in our school district recently that was like the first star shining in a black night sky. So who's up for a feel-good story?

The high school from which my kids graduated is in a nearby small town. Graduating classes average 200-225 seniors. Homecoming week is special. A student government-led food drive kicks off in a big way. A parade winds through streets lined with red-clad crowds cheering the marching band, floats from every conceivable club, clusters of elementary school walkers, etc. School spirit runs high through many long-held traditions. The entire week has a very Norman Rockwell-ish feel to it.

The selection of Homecoming King and Queen, though, is mostly a popularity contest. No surprise there. This year, though, one of the guys the student body included on the court was a special needs student, Alex (not his real name). Alex is the kind of guy who knows and loves everybody. When he walks the halls, he's constantly shouting greetings, high-fiving and flashing his bright smile. A staff member at the high school describes him as "always positive, always happy, always genuine."

Alex's parents nixed his participation in one Homecoming week tradition:   The 24 kids on the court spend the evenings leading up to Friday night's game TPing each other's houses. (The police pretty much look the other way, as they have for years and years. I know. Weird.) Since Alex couldn't be included in these hijinks, the other guys on the court arrived at his home on Thursday night and (prearranged with his parents) surprised him with a trip to a bowling alley. While he was gone, the 12 girls on the court (again, with his parents' okay) swooped in to decorate the inside of Alex's home and hang a big CONGRATS poster. Pretty cool.

Then the student body pulled off something that knocked the collective socks off the community. When the candidates lined up on the sideline during halftime of the big game, the king's crown was placed upon the unsuspecting head of . . . Alex.

Talk about classy. I wasn't there, but I'm told the roar that went up from the crowd was enough to give you goosebumps. 

With "dark" news bombarding us on a daily basis, I'm so grateful for stories like this one that bring back the light. They remind me that the vast majority of us are still guided by kindness and compassion. Shine on, peeps.

Jill Esbaum

Tribute to My Friend and Fellow Writer Laura Crawford

Today, I was supposed to continue our series of posts in honor of National Bullying Prevention Month. Instead, I've decided to dedicate this blog post in memory of my friend and fellow writer, Laura Crawford, who died on September 30 at the much-too-young age of 46. And since today is also Poetry Friday, I've included a poem at the end of this post inspired by Laura.

Those of you who've been following this blog for awhile may recognize Laura's name--she was our very first "Student Success Story" interview, posted back in 2009.  At that time, I had no idea Laura had been diagnosed with chronic lymphatic leukemia (CLL) the year before. As she wrote on her CaringBridge page, her disease was managed effectively with chemo and treatment until this past May, when it became more aggressive. That's when Laura chose to finally share the information about her illness with her many friends in the children's writing community. We were all shocked at the news. Laura was such a vibrant, energetic, optimistic person. You can get a sense of her vitality in the photo below, which is how I always picture her--bright-eyed and smiling. It was hard to imagine that she'd been dealing with cancer for five years.

Photo courtesy of Jennifer DuBose

But after the shock wore off, we still had hope, mainly because Laura herself sounded so hopeful. She was preparing for a bone marrow transplant. On September 22, she posted the following on her Facebook page:

"had a FANTASTIC weekend! I feel normal...and that is saying a lot. Thanks for all the visitors, laughs, treats, jello, ice cream and support of the new 'hairdo.' I'm so very blessed."

Like so many of Laura's friends, I was heartbroken when she passed away eight days later. It didn't seem possible. Even now, nearly two weeks later, my eyes fill with tears at the thought that I'll never see her smiling face again, at least not in this life.

We have a custom on our SCBWI-Illinois listserv to share "good news" about our writing and illustrating projects at the beginning of each month. Given the timing of Laura's death, Lisa Bierman, the Illinois chapter's co-regional advisor, invited members to share a short memory of Laura instead. Laura was a long-time SCBWI Network Representative for the Geneva, IL Network and a regular volunteer at the annual SCBWI-IL Prairie Writer's Day, so she was well-known throughout our writing community. The email tributes poured in. It was amazing, and uplifting, to read about how Laura had touched so many lives.

In my email to the listserv, I talked about how I first met Laura as my student, when she took my College of DuPage class in Writing for Children back in the summer of 2001. As I mentioned above, she was also our first "Student Success Story Interview" here on TeachingAuthors. After her death, I reread that blog entry and heard again Laura's exuberant voice. I also recalled how she almost hadn't made it into my class because it was filled before she registered. She'd called the college and asked if there was any way she could still register for the class, and my supervisor contacted me. I normally don’t make exceptions regarding maximum enrollments because I want to allow enough time for manuscript critiques, and I returned Laura's call planning to tell her so. I remember sitting in my home office talking with Laura. I could hear the enthusiasm in her voice. She told me how much she wanted to take the class, and that, being a teacher, she didn't have time to do so during the school year. When she asked me to please let her join the class, I couldn’t say no. J

I’m so grateful I made the exception to include Laura in the class. It was the beginning of a long, rewarding friendship. As it turned out, Cathy Cronin was also in that class. She, too, became a "Student Success Story" and a friend to both Laura and me. On Wednesday, October 2, Cathy and I drove together to attend Laura's wake and say a final good-bye. We learned from Laura's sisters that she'd kept writing and editing up until the end--she was optimistic that after her bone marrow transplant she'd be well again.

That evening, I decided I wanted to dedicate this blog post in Laura's memory, and to write a poem in her honor. I'd saved all the tributes posted on the SCBWI-Illinois listserv with the idea that I might write a "found poem" from what people had shared. Member after member wrote of Laura's warm smile, infectious laugh, generous spirit, amazing optimism, welcoming nature, and fun sense of humor. I soon realized I didn't want to write a "sappy" poem--Laura wouldn't have wanted that.

Then I thought of what Laura said in her Student Success Story interview about being a "math and science person." That gave me the idea to write my poem in the form of a “Fib,” a 5-line, 20-syllable poem with the number of syllables per line based on the Fibonacci sequence: 1/1/2/3/5/8. I thought this form would be especially appropriate because the Fibonacci sequence is often found in nature, and Laura loved nature. Plus, "Fibs" tend to be rather playful. [To read more about Fibs, see this blog post by Greg Pincus, author of the recently released middle-grade novel, The 14 Fibs of Gregory K (Arthur A. Levine Books).]

The Fib that follows was inspired by all the comments to the listserv, but especially by what Cathy Cronin wrote:

"I will always treasure her friendship. Her bright spirit will live on in all the hearts that she's touched and in all of her wonderful books. I am keeping a picture of her by my laptop as a reminder to 'Live like Laura.' She knew what was important to her and spent her time well. "

I agree with Cathy. Laura lives on in the hearts of all who knew her, not only the members of the children's writing community, but also the students she taught in her 20 years at Sleepy Hollow Elementary School. You can read more about how she touched their lives in this article.

Finally, here's my Fib poem in memory of Laura.

           To Live Like Laura
                    by Carmela Martino

           Smile
           wide.
           Embrace
           everyone.
           Laugh with gusto.
           Leave us grateful to have known you.
                 poem © 2013 Carmela Martino. All rights reserved.

For today's Poetry Friday round-up, head over to Laura Purdie Salas's blog.


And keep on writing!
Carmela

How to Stop a Bully: Read a book and Write (especially on Wednesdays)!

Here’s hoping Jack, of I AM JACK fame and my Monday TeachingAuthors post, his creator Susanne Gervay and his U.S. publisher Kane Miller don’t mind my tweaking their terrific anti-bullying campaign logo – “Read a book.  Stop a bully.”

Of course, there's all sorts of action a person can take when up close and personal with a Bully, whether that person is the bullied, the bystander or the bully himself.
This being Wednesday, however, I’m focused on writerly action.

So here are three important anti-bullying books that prompt readers to pick up pen and paper and write from the heart, remembering and reflecting on what they’ve experienced first-hand and/or what they’ve witnessed

Dear Bully: Seventy Authors Tell Their Stories (HarperTeen, 2011)

YA authors Carrie Jones and Megan Kelly Hall edited and contributed to this anthology of seventy personal bullying stories written by seventy well-known children’s and YA authors, including Carolyn Mackler, R.L. Stine, Lisa Yee and Eric Luper.  Booklist lauded the collection for its timeliness and the resources it offers, including an appended, annotated list of websites that furthers its usefulness and extends group discussion.
The book even has a website – dearbully.com.

LETTERS TO A BULLIED GIRL: Messages of Healing and Hope by Olivia Gardner, Emily Buder, and Sarah Buder (William Morrow paperback, 2008)
When teenage sisters Emily and Sarah Buder read in the newspaper about the unforgiveable bullying of northern California middle schooler and epileptic Olivia Gardner, they initiated a campaign to get their friends to write Olivia letters of encouragement.  The effort spread like wildfire.  This book shares many of the letters in which the letter writers recollected a panorama of bullying incidents.

EACH KINDNESS by Jacqueline Woodson, illustrated by E.B. Lewis (Nancy Paulsen Books/Penguin, 2012)

A Jane Addams Award Book and a Coretta Scott King Honor Book, EACH KINDNESS  beautifully underscores the “If only’s…” and lost opportunities  when one could have acted and shown kindness but didn’t.  In a starred review, SLJ noted the book “gives opportunity for countless inferences and deep discussion, inviting readers to pause, reflect, and empathize.”

Write on! Right on!

Esther Hershenhorn
P.S.
Happy Birthday to my fellow TA JoAnn Early Macken, her twin sister Judy, our reader Linda Baie and our reader Michelle Heidenrich Barnes’ husband! J

P.P.S.

Don’t forget! Only a few hours remain to enter our Book Giveaway of Alexis O’Neill’s newest book The Kite That Bridged Two Nations.

                                                                    * * *

It’s Unity Day! Make it orange and make it end!  Unite against bullying!

Wear orange – or write with an orange crayon or magic marker – or even just write while drinking a class of orange juice!

In EACH KINDNESS, Chloe realizes it was too late to show her

now-departed classmate Maya kindness.

            “That afternoon, I walked home alone.

            when I reached the pond, my throat filled with
            all the things I wished I would have said to Maya.
            Each kindness I had never shown.

            I threw small stones into it, over and over.
            watching the way the water rippled out and away.
            Out and away.

            Like each kindness – done and not done.

            Like every girl somewhere –
            holding a small gift out to someone
            and that someone turning away from it.”

It’s never too late to turn around an “If only…”

Take a moment. 
Remember a time in which you stood by and watched someone being bullied.
(If you need to jog your memory, take the Pacer survey.)
Pause.
Reflect.
Empathize.

Now, address the victim, as in - Dear ______.
Describe the situation – the place, the time, the situation, the people present, what was at stake.  Can you remember the weather, the nearby sounds, what you were thinking, why you chose to act as you did. (Note: April's WWW offers further suggestions for concrete details.)

Then write the words you wished you'd said.

Read a Book. Stop a Bully.

Meet 11-year-old Jack.

He’s funny. He’s inventive. He has a rich and loving family that includes his very busy Mum, his rather odd Nana, his sort-of-stepdad Rob and his sister Samantha.   
He likes everything most boys his age do, whether they live in the U.S. or Australia: going to school, learning, hanging out with his friends.
How perfect his Life would be if only his classmate George Hamel vanished!
Alas, a lame joke on Jack’s part led to George calling him a “Butt head.” Once the whole school joined in, Jack’s school days spelled D-A-N-G-E-R.

Jack shares his plight in the award-winning I AM JACK, a rite-of-passage children’s book in Australia lauded as “accessible and hilarious…an absolute must.” Published in the U.S. by KaneMiller in 2012, School Library Journal called I AM JACK “a solid addition to the growing collection of books about bullying.”

Jack’s first engagingly-told novel was adapted into a successfully-touring play in Australia and will begin its U.S. run in 2014.
His second and third novels include ALWAYS JACK (which deals with cancer in families) and SUPER JACK (which deals with blended families.)

Now meet Jack’s creator, Susanne Gervay, the award-winning, Order of Australia for Literature author whom I proudly call friend, colleague and SCBWI Kin. (Susanne serves as the Regional Advisor for SCBWI’s Eastern Australia and New ZealandChapter.)

Jack, it turns out, was based on Susanne’s real-life son Jack.

“When I discovered that Jack was being bullied, I fulfilled my Jack's worst nightmare. Yes, I went up to the school. Yes, he was scared. Yes, the school acted. Yes, the bully was called up.

It took six months for things to really change. Eventually my Jack worked through the bullying with the support of family, friends, the school. By the end he felt good about himself, had great friends, loved his school, did his school work, played soccer and learnt that society can be a fair place.”

Susanne shared with me an email that followed her recent school visit to a multicultural state school, the Bankstown Public School in Sydney.  Here’s what Akila in 5p posted on the class blog:

 

“At first if someone calls you names like Bumhead (poor Jack) it's funny, the next time it's just nothing, a million times feels like ok you can stop now and a jillion times equals AHHHHHH I had enough!" Remember what Susanne Gervay said. Teasing is not bullying. Bullying affects you in a different way. It makes you scared. We can help stop bullying in many ways! You've got to give a helping hand and help someone else in trouble. And remember George Hamel? Well I remember Susanne saying that he had supporters which can happen here too. Bullying can happen at anytime and anywhere. If you're bullied then tell somebody. Your family and friends are there to love and help you so appreciate that!”

Exploring the website for National Bullying Prevention Month, sponsored by Pacer, I was taken with the Pacer Center tag – “Champions for Children with Disabilities.”
“Disables,” I said to myself. “That’s what bullying – in any form, does.  It DIS-ables the victim.”
But as Jack says in the KaneMiller book sticker that introduces this post,
reading stops a bully.
Reading EN-ables – the victim, the aggressor, the observer – to take action.
Or at least it can and should, with the right book.

I applaud MaryAnn and April for sharing their vulnerability so honestly in last week’s posts, and in the books and poems they write.

I applaud Susanne Gervay for doing the same in I AM JACK.

Marian Dane Bauer spoke the Truth in WHAT’S YOUR STORY?: we need to put our own stories in the stories we write if they’re ever to resound in our readers’ hearts, if they're ever to enable our readers to do what needs doing.

Thanks, Susanne and Jack, for doing just that!

Esther Hershenhorn

P.S.

Don’t forget! The October 9 deadline looms for our Book Giveaway of Alexis O’Neill’s newest book The Kite That Bridged Two Nations.

 

National Bullying Prevention Month, Book Giveaway, Birthday Sale, and Poetry Friday!

National Bullying Prevention Month

As April and Mary Ann have pointed out in their moving and helpful posts, October is National Bullying Prevention Month. Resources for parents, teachers, students, and communities are available at PACER’s National Bullying Prevention Center.

Wednesday, October 9, is Unity Day, when people who care will wear orange to show their support. More information is on UNITY DAY, 2013's Facebook page.

When I started exploring what to write about for this post, I began (as I often do) with a search on the Milwaukee Public Library's web site. The subject "Bullying" brought up 53 categories of books about bullying, including Bullying in Schools, Bullying Juvenile Fiction (477 titles!), and Bullying Prevention Juvenile Literature.

Overwhelming, isn't it?

I decided to focus on one classic book, Bootsie Barker Bites by Barbara Bottner, illustrated by Peggy Rathmann. I've always liked the satisfying way the young narrator triumphs in the end.

At first, her mother tells her she has to play with Bootsie. When the girl resists, her mother tells her she has to "learn to get along with all kinds of people."

When the poor girl "can't stand it anymore" and shouts, her mother looks surprised. (Ack. How clueless can we parents be sometimes?) The girl goes to her room to think over her response to her mother's suggestion that she tell Bootsie she doesn't want to play that game.

A light bulb flashed when I reread the book after seeing what an expert on disruptive behavior said in April's post:

1. Bullies pick on people who are weaker than they are.
2. You need to stand up to a bully.
3. Be empathetic.
4. Create clear boundaries.

In her room, the girl in Bootsie Barker Bites invents her own creative way to handle the situation. She stands up and looks Bootsie in the eye. She's not exactly empathetic, but empathy is a lot to ask of a kid who's been tormented. She does create a clear boundary by refusing to play along with the bully's demands. What's satisfying about the conclusion is that she solves the problem for herself. I love books that inspire kids to take control when they need to. How I wish all bullied kids could find one book or person or piece of advice that would empower them to stand up for themselves. I hope these resources help.

Book Giveaway

Enter by October 9!
Check out the details in April's September 27 post for the Teaching Authors Book Giveaway, featuring The Kite That Bridged Two Nations by Alexis O'Neill.

Birthday Sale

Besides being Unity Day and the last day of the Book Giveaway, October 9 is my birthday—mine and my twin sister Judy's, that is. I'm celebrating with a Birthday Sale: Order Write a Poem Step by Step from Lulu.com  through Wednesday and save 20%! Here's a poem from the book, written by a third grader in one of my poetry workshops. This is what today looks and sounds like in Wisconsin.

Thunderstorm

Wet.

A big flash of light and a BOOM!

Drip drop drip drop.

Dark.

Melanie Gilmore, Grade 3

Poetry Friday

Today's Poetry Friday Roundup is at Dori Reads. Enjoy!

JoAnn Early Macken

Bullying...A Writing Prompt for our Wednesday Writing Workout

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Breaking News:

April's poem, "When Mom Plays Just for Me" appears on Children’s Poet Laureate Kenn Nesbitt's homepage www.PoetryMinute.org:
http://www.poetryminute.org/when-mom-plays-just-for-me-by-april-halprin-wayland/

Howdy Campers!

Remember to enter our current giveaway of Alexis O'Neill's book, The Kite That Bridged Two Nations ~

Welcome to another edition of TeachingAuthors'...

Okay...raise your hand if you've never been bullied.

Yeah, me, too.

Mary Ann kicked off our discussion on bullying for National Bullying Month (who knew?) with a deeply affecting post, I Wonder What Happened to Todd: A Bully's Tale.

Bullies I've known remind me of turtles: mostly they stay in their civilized shells, and then, without warning, they stretch their heads out and snap off someone's finger.

I had to chair a meeting of a non-profit organization this weekend to decide what we were going to do about a member who is a bully.

I'll call our guy Bluto.  Bluto, like the turtle, was usually friendly--he'd come early to set-up chairs, help collect dues, etc.  Every once in a while, though, he'd explode at someone shy, someone weak, someone Not Important.  In the latest incident, the atmosphere in our meeting was so toxic, people felt afraid for their safety.  Things had clearly gone too far.

Attending a meeting to figure out how to handle Bluto was not on the top of my list of fun things to do on a beautiful Sunday afternoon.  Ahead of this would have been eating a porcupine, finding out my father was a single-celled alga, and staying in bed all day.  

Staying in bed all day--
a great alternative to being a grown-up....

In preparation for this meeting, I spoke at length with an expert on disruptive behavior.  I learned:
1) Bullies pick on people who are weaker than they are.
2) You need to stand up to a bully.
3) Be empathetic.
4) Create clear boundaries.

I can always use a good script.  She gave me words to use (or not):

We need you to take a time out from our organization for six months. This is the natural consequence of your actions. We hope you understand. This is also hard for us.  We're saddened. We hope you will use the next six months to work on this.  At the end of six months, if you chose to come back (and we hope you do) we hope you'll have taken the opportunity to work on this.  We'll meet with you and talk with you before you come back to a meeting.  We hope you do work it out.  People are afraid of you and you need to look at that. If you cannot, boy, we're sure going to miss you.  This is a great loss for us. (Hug him.)

At the end of six months, here's what's expected: Civility. You can't yell. You can't create a threat. You need to listen.

Interestingly enough, during the meeting on what to do about Bluto, Mary Kate shot out an angry comment. At that moment I realized that I'm as afraid of Mary Kate as I am of Bluto.  I remembered what I had learned from the expert, took a deep breath and said, "Could you not speak so angrily to me?"

Mary Kate's response was dramatic.  She looked at me in surprise--almost as if I had awakened her from a dream.  She apologized. During the rest of the meeting she was kinder to all of us than she'd ever been.

Amazing how that works.  And that sense that I awakened a bully from a dream?  That's sometimes how I feel when I eat too much...suddenly I wake up and say, "Whoa!  I think we're finished with lunch!"

I wouldn't be surprised if bullying behavior was an addiction, like smoking, drinking, overeating, compulsive spending, hoarding, etc.  Hmm.

So, today's Wednesday Writing Workout focuses on 2013 National Bullying Month's theme, The end of bullying begins with me.

Here's your writing workout:

1) Who is a bully?  Choose Bluto (of the Popeye fame),someone who once bullied you, or someone who intimidates you today.

2) Pretend that bully is in front of you now.  Jot down how you feel or how you felt as a child facing that bully.  Include details of the place, smells, physical sensations (has your stomach turned to acid? Are your palms sweaty?).  Include weather, background noises you hear or can't hear because you're so frightened, what gives you courage or how you ate a box of cookies later to blot out the fear.

4) Now: make a boundary.  Write what you wish you could have said to the bully.  Scribble to your heart's content. Be annoyed.  Be angry.  Be clear.  Tell that bully to BACK OFF!

5) That's your raw material.  Now go ahead and write the bully story or poem you really, really really need to write.

P.S: I'm pleased that one of my poems appears in the terrific book, THE BULLY, THE BULLIED, THE BYSTANDER, THE BRAVE edited by David Booth and Larry Swartz (Rubicon Publishing)

Thank you for stopping by today! 

Remember to go to this blog post for the Book Giveaway details for The Kite That Bridged Two Nations.  And g'luck!Alexis, by the way, is also the author of a wonderful picture book about a bully, The Recess Queen.

~ posted by April Halprin Wayland who is no longer afraid of Tom P, from second grade.